Homemade Green Products

Oy. I suck at blogging. I NEVER can seem to keep up with this damn page. 

Keeping with the theme I thought I would add some things "Made by Me"- My husband and I really enjoy making our own food and products from scratch. Some of you may be thinking, Aint nobody got time for that! However I can tell you that you do. If you do it right- and once you do it a couple times it starts to come very quickly and easily. 

Some of the things we made ourselves instead of buying them in a store include- Spaghetti sauce, ice cream, bread, green cleaning spray, window cleaning spray, oven cleaner, toilet bowl cleaner, disinfectant spray, odor busting spray, and my own combinations of essential oils which I use instead of candles. 

Whats the point you may ask? Well.... I know whats in all of this stuff. That the point. I know I put it in there- I know it is non toxic, or not cloned, or made with formaldehyde, dyes, perfumes, or whatever else american companies are currently trying to poisen us with. 

So here is your first recipe! It is mine oh mine- and I love it! 

Green Cleaning Spray- Countertop Cleaner

25oz Spray bottle
1 cup White Vinegar
2 tsp Pure Castile Soap- lavender
1tbsp Hydrogen Proxide
10 Drops Lavender essential Oil
10 Lemon essential Oil
Fill the rest with water

Spray on Paper towel and wipe clean. For tougher areas spray directly on counter top wait 2 mins and wipe away clean. No streaks no toxins. Happy Momma.

I need a do over...

I love trying new recipes & I love it even more when they require little to no work on my part and taste delicious. Last night I tried Crock Pot Chicken Tacos. They were wonderful- So good that they are now posted to my pinterest (http://pinterest.com/meroesch/)... and well now my blog. They are not my recipe though so I must give credit to Chocolate Therapy. http://www.mychocolatetherapy.com/2012/01/crockpot-chicken-tacos.html  Thank you dear girl for making dinner be the only sucessful part of my Thursday. 

It started off so promising too. Great drop off at Preschool. AM had a great day at Preschool. I remembered to do all my Mommy Homework for AM's class (score!) which is a feat- Because in my mind I should just drop her off and then reappear in 3 hours refreshed and not actually having to be responsible for anything other then the appropriate drop off time.

During my wondrous three hours- I worked out, watered the plants, fed the fish, bought Mums, planted the Mums, and put together dinner. Awesome for three hours seeing as how I normally don't get through drinking my entire cup of coffee in three hours.

We (kids in tow) went to Wegman's bought a bottle of wine, some lunch- kids took great naps! Sounds ducky so far but thats where it ended. The day turned to shit after that- pardon me-

Kids woke up and I decided to bake a cake to go with the wine and AMAZING tacos. I get half way through pulling ingredients and notice I am out of vanilla, but it was here yesterday...FAIL 1

 So I call the usual culprit- the hubs- yep it is at his desk. What may I ask do you need with my vanilla at work?? humph.... Then I realize I am also in no way prepared to make icing. So off to the store we go (kids in tow) Walmart had everything- But I FORGOT the damn Vanilla Extract. FAIL 2<---

I get home and realize my mistake. The entire reason I went there in the first place. WAH. So I decide that I could use something to substitute- something sweet... Karo Syrup jumped out at me. BIG mistake. Why I thought using the most sticky stuff in the world was a good idea I don't know. Continuing on... the cake bakes, the cake smells wonderful... the cake also looks like it has been attacked by my dog by the time I am getting it out of the pan. FAIL 3<---

Fast forward a couple hours. Bedtime... Dad's working late. Mommy is alone- its 2 on 1. We do this at naptime every day should be a piece of cake right? Well I flopped the damn cake - and apparently bedtime too...

Looked something like this... AM starts whining about bedtime.. Okay score it is only 7:30- we can go to bed early tonight... put the dog outside so she isn't in the way. Ryan starts with the fussing. Give them both a bath at the same time. Dry Ryan off... AM comes into the room SOAKING wet from the bath climbs on the Rocking Bear in Ry's room- Falls off rocking bear. Starts crying... meanwhile I hear a large pop come from the front yard and then silence.. then the dog is barking at the back deck making all kinds of racket... AM is still crying... Ry's hungry but I am trying to hold him off. Dry AM coddle her to stop the crying. Get her in bed- Ry comes in too. Read a story. Ry cries all the way through story... which means the relaxing part of the process is shot to hell- say good night to AM- but we start with the excuses... I have to pee, I need water, there's  a monster under my bed, yadda yadda yadda, shut door and woke on getting Ry to sleep because someone HAS to freakin SLEEP in this house tonight.

30 minutes later we are done. The natives are quietly resting in their beds. At which point I walk outside and hubs is in the driveway- and my new pumpkin is in the middle of the front yard with the DOG. Stem gone, labbie wagging about her new found treasure for all she is worth. Really?

I need a do over from about 4pm on.

Items used in this disaster of a day:

And one more makes 4.

Where my body seemed to be lacking in its ability to evict my son naturally- It has more then made up for it in the breastfeeding department.Ryan is now 8 months old and thriving! He has been exclusively breastfed for all 8 months and growing like a weed. I feel incredibly blessed to be able to support my child completely through my own milk. I know this isn't an option for many.

I also feel incredible pressure to stop breastfeeding and I am not really sure why. I feel like I get this pressure from a generation where breastfeed was thought of as the "hippy" thing to do. Where now it seems like my generation feels like it is almost a disservice to your child if you cannot breastfeed. Most of this pressure derives from people who are not currently mothers- or have never breastfed a child before. So I am not sure why I am giving them much credit in my own head. Mostly I think its because their comments like "what are you going to breastfeed him until he is 5?" and "Don't you want a life?" really seem to rock my nerves. I'm pretty strong but enough of these comments start to get to me.

I can tell you this- the bond I feel with my son is so much more then the bond I felt with my daughter when she was an infant. I don't know if it is because he has been breastfeeding or if it is because he is a second child and I now know just how to love him. I feel bad for 1st children- My daughter seemed to be my learning curve child. I learned how to be a mother with her- which sometimes included crying, grumpiness, confusion and being scared. I already kinda know what I am doing this round so all there is room for is love. Annemarie has taught me so much & I am grateful.

I have to say when I found out I was having another child I was so scared. I didn't know if I was going to be able to love another baby. After all I am an only child- I had no concept of what a multiple child home looks like or acts like. How was I to split my time? My love? Affection? What if he came and I didn't know what to do with a boy? Or what if he didn't like me? Or Annemarie? Oh sure now I think about these feelings and I think they are silly. But really at the time- they kept me up at night.

For a long time I struggled with where I wanted to take this blog. Thats why there haven't been many updates. I think really I might have figured it out. I have many passions but decorating, cooking & mothering seem to be high on the list. This blog will be a mix of the them until one or the other takes over. All are Made by Me- My projects, my food & my kids.

All I Ever Wanted

About three weeks ago the most joyous event happened- I gave birth to my son. He came early by two weeks. Which was a total shock to me because I never even went into labor with my first child.

I wrote to everyone previously about my quest for natural childbirth. I wanted Ryan (my son) to come on his own time, without drugs or intervention. And true to my word I tried my hardest to make that happen. I waited until I wasn’t able to talk through my contractions; they were about 4 minutes apart when we left for the hospital. I had been in labor since before 9 AM on this same day and by the time I would leave for the hospital it was 9:30 PM at night. Twelve hours is a long time to have back labor. When I got the hospital, the Doctors hooked me up to the monitors and I was indeed having contractions. They were now 3 minutes apart and starting to resemble “mountains” instead of “peaks.”  My doctor decided to check me and see how far along I was… I wasn’t even dilated 1 centimeter. In fact the nurse couldn’t even find my cervix to check for dilation because it was so high in my pelvis. I was in a lot of pain and obviously not getting anywhere with the contractions- after about 45 minutes my doctor and nurse came in to tell us that they were prepping an OR for us. We were having the baby tonight via Cesarean Section.

Was I upset? Yep. I asked my Doctor what my chances of getting this baby out on my own were and her reply was less then favorable. I was really hoping that I was going to be able to do the natural childbirth thing. I wanted to feel the pain, pushing, and the cry at the end that makes it all worth it. But it didn’t seem to be in the cards for me. Apparently I am very good at growing babies, but not so good at the eviction process.

I know part of me feels like my body has failed me in some way. I feel that millions of women are able to do this and yet my body didn’t seem to get the memo. I feel that in some small way I am less of a “woman” because I can’t birth my child on my own. I think in a small way I feel like because I wrote down what I wanted that it was going to open the door to much criticism because I didn’t get the chance to do all the pushing and sweating.

Such is life I suppose- But then I look at Ryan and I just feel lucky. I feel lucky because if I was trying to have babies 100 years ago one of us could have died in the process. I feel lucky because he melts my heart when I hold him to nurse. I feel lucky because I have a healthy baby when many don’t have the luxury of that outcome. So in the long run it doesn’t matter how he got here- it just matters that he is here. And that’s all I ever wanted.

What do I expect?

My husband and I are due with our second child in just three weeks time. This one is a boy (we already have a wonderful little girl, Annemarie) and is cooking right along. In the spirit of preparing for the babies birth my husband and I were discussing all the necessary tasks which we should complete before Ryan (boy on the way) arrives. Really serious things like finishing the nursery, cleaning all the bathrooms, packing a hospital bag, packing a bag for our daughter, packing a bag for the dog... and then he asked the question. Which now just seems loaded... “is there anything else you want me to do for the hospital part of this?” And without much thought I told him that I needed him to just be there for me, I mean that’s all we pregnant Moms really want right?

The conversation continues through out the evening. At one point, I asked him to google some relaxation techniques to help me through my attempt at Natural Birth. When he asked where to do for such information I thought I would be a smart ass and hit google, type in “dads role in birth” and just had him the iPad. So I did. Without reading what I just handed him. Big mistake! Because if you google that exact phrase and click on the first entry- mine happens to be from BabyCenter- the article is less then fulfilling. In fact it says NOTHING to the effect of what Dad’s role is in the hospital/birth. It basically says- “your role has changed...” Nothing to the effect of what he should bring, who he should call, massage, counter pressure, scented oils, a bathing suit for showering with me during labor... I mean nothing. WHO WROTE that article?? I want their job if they are getting the big bucks to write for BabyCenter...

So anyway- when I handed him the iPad without reading what I had just thrown in his lap like I was hottie pottie, he looked at the screen and says, “are you serious? Did you even read this?”

That pretty much ended my expedition to make him feel silly for not “knowing” what to do... because then I did read it- along with some other websites which were equally disappointing- and I immediately understood why he was asking me in the first place. There isn’t really great information for him to access- and when he does find something, he really is not sure if it is going to apply to my situation. Kudos hubs, I owe you undo credit. Thanks for asking the right questions and taking time to listen to me.

We spent the rest of the evening together- sans TV, surfing iTunes for relaxing music, setting up our HBOgo account, and planning how we will be spending those glorious magical moments trying to keep me from thinking about how much pain I am going to be in.

Side note- We found useful information available on http://www.americanpregnancy.org/

Au Naturale or No?

You might say I'm a little late to the ball game with this one, but better late then never right? I'm 36+ pregnant with my second child and I am contemplating natural child birth. I know I say this and there are two schools of thought... one being that birth is natural & should be left that way. Limited medical intervention, no epidurals, Episiotomy (ahh!), notta, nothing, do it in a field with wise men watching. Then there is the group that thinks this is nuts. They are the ones that want to give birth pain free with an epidural and a latte. I have friends on both sides, who have done it both ways. I have met people who had babies fall out of them and those of us who don't quite have it so easy. I get it... everyone thinks something different. Even medical professionals can't agree on the right approach.

Here is where I'm generally stuck. I had a C with my first child. I was 41 weeks pregnant, my fluid levels were dropping, she was getting big & it was time to send her the eviction notice.I had the induction, things went okay- I was in pain but not dying or screaming. I did it for 12 hours, and then she fell asleep. Literally, fell asleep, out cold, nothing would wake her up or move her. Her heart rate wouldn't stay on the monitor and then they gave us a choice. I can keep going for another couple hours see how things went or I could get it over with and they could get her out now. Mind you there were 5 of them sitting in the room with myself, my husband, my mother (who almost died having me) and father (who witnessed my birth & ordeal). I'll just say that I was scared by the urgency I felt and more scared my the monitor that kept beeping in my ear... I was petrified when my Dad looked at me and said very seriously "get her out and here safely."

I opted for the C section. I signed the paper, the hospital staff whisked away all my loved ones at the same time, and left me with a nurse and anesthesiologist who quickly lost feeling in his right hand when I refused to let go of it. The operation wasn't that bad, to be honest I don't remember anything other then really bright lights and the fact that my doctor was talking with nurses about going to the beach later that month. Relaxing right? Other then the giant blue cloth, the no feeling, and the clattering of instruments on the table next to me I was just peachy and balling my eyes out. I was so scared- then I saw her. They held her up, stitched me up, and sent us into recovery. This is where we stayed for 3+ hours while I regained feeling in my legs. I was afraid to hold my baby because I was so drugged. That night was not a pleasant experience.

At 3 am (12 hours after my surgery) the nurse came in to wake me up. So that my chances of developing blood clots from sitting for so long would be diminished. I had to get up under my own power waddle to the bathroom. I was helped to wash my incision off with a squeegee bottle and rag over a toilet. The pain I felt was like someone had kicked me in the gut repeatedly with steal toe boots. The nurse then helped me to change my dressing and mesh panties. Then back to bed I waddled to "go back to sleep" before the baby was wheeled back in for feeding.  

I didn't read a lot about birth before having my daughter. I was young the pregnancy was a surprise and we had a hell of a lot going on. I got married, moved, & had a baby with in a 6 month time span. That's a couple of whammies on life's big to do list to have happen all at once. But forgive me if I don't want to go through with the above mentioned ordeal one more time. Or ever again...

Back to being stuck. I am going for a VBAC. This is the general term for Vaginal Birth After Cesarean. There risks associate with this type of birth. about 1% of these end up with a rupture of the uterus. This is when there is a tear in my incision from my previous C section and my uterus tears open allowing the baby to float out into my abdomen. In some cases, about 7% of the 1% who rupture, this means the mother or child will perish. Not a happy thought. Never the less I am an educated woman & I need to seriously consider my risks vs. rewards.


I know I can do this. I can have this baby. Without being cut, with out drugs of any kind, with a happy ending. But it involves risk.... and I need to figure out which part of my brain I should listen to- The part that says "you can do it, you can do it, rah rah rah" or the part that says "shut up, suck it up, and get him here with minimal risk."

Finally the work on the deck has begun!

So happy that we finally are having the deck worked on! It is going to look amazing. We are having a fresh coat of paint added to brighten it up for Spring get togethers- BBQ's and wine/dinner parties are on their way! Equally happy someone else is painting all those spindles. (-;

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